So I would have to say I am a passionate person, read the rest of my posts and you will see this! As most passionate people this can be good and can be misdirected. My passion is righting the injustice to children, I find joy in working with the less fortunate and those children who have a story that would make most of us feel squeamish.
This passion however is not for everyone, I have a history with it and it has become a part of my life, my heart. So many times I want people to come behind me in my passions, to see how I see the world. They can't, that emotion about that specific cause is not instilled in them like it is in me.
When I get the chance to be involved in something I'm passionate about I just want to get everyone on board, and sometimes this works, sometimes people volunteer, or give money. But I have realized, it's not necessarily that people need to be passionate about that specific area, but that they can be passionate about something.
So my challenge goes out to all to find something that you can get behind and help out with. To bring passion into your life. The opportunities are out there, from helping helpless animals to kids to the environment. There is a cause that anyone can help out with.
Saturday, April 28, 2012
Thursday, April 26, 2012
Running Grateful
Running is a part of my life, and definitely part of my genes. I try to get away from it and always come back to this solo and inspiring sport. So as one would guess I learn and understand quite a bit while running. This post was inspired while running a half marathon.
I had run this race before and had known how humbling it was so being knocked down a few notches running this quite challenging race wasn't a surprise. What was learned from this race is the question I plan to answer. I chose to run this race with my dad, it's something we do now, torture ourselves in distance road races...don't ask why, weird therapy I guess. Anyway so my original goal in the race was to keep up with my dad, then to keep up or beat my friend (Rob) who ran the race with an athlete in tandem (pushing a athlete who is unable to run in a wheelchair of sorts). As per my usual I didn't train well for this race, no hill or speed training, just a few longer runs here and there. The course has a hill on it known as "Monster Hill" or "Golgotha" for it's grueling incline. That being said, for one to do well they should train. So I put myself in a great place to learn a little humility, especially because I have quite the mouth and will trash talk a little bit.
I started the race out keeping up with my dad, for approximately 2 minutes, he then took off and my thought was well I can maybe keep up. I quickly realized that was a pipe dream and chose to focus on my own pace and enjoy the race. I finished the first and second hill and was passed by one of Rob's teammates with an athlete in tandem, I was taken aback grateful however that it wasn't Rob (my competitive spirit came out). This is when my brain started processing some ideas. I was then passed by another athlete team, at this point one word kept running through my head, GRATEFUL. What it meant I wasn't far from understanding.
Around mile 5 and about to climb hill number 3, I began to feel my lack of training, my feet began throbbing. My immediate thought was to pity myself, well you were just so busy helping others achieve there goals you couldn't train and work is really stressful. Then I thought about those who were passing me. My dad with a fulltime job and a family to take care of. Rob, who works fulltime and then was helping a fellow athlete. So I squashed the pity thoughts and continued to run to the best of my ability. Not long after this point I was passed by a runner without arms, I don't know his story but I do know that I use my arms a good amount while running, especially when I haven't trained. So here I am a few minutes before trying to pity myself for not training and I'm passed by an athlete who isn't whole according to traditional standards. More pain kicks in while running down the last hill followed by another runner sans arms. My thought is "really? really?", now realizing that maybe this race was to teach me something.
I'm now running and thinking more. Remembering the need to be grateful for all the little things. So I start small. Well I'm breathing, I think, it's labored breath and not consistent from lack of training but I'm still alive and breathing. Then it's the fact that I do have a body that works and carries me through the miles that I push it through. Followed by thankfulness for the cool breeze keeping me from overheating on this hot day. Now my mind is filled with thoughts of gratefulness for this event. I continue to run, counting the miles hoping to finish soon. I hit the trail, which I consider the hardest part of this race, it's a mind game, over half way there and supposedly downhill, it never seems that easy from that point. I'm dragging beginning to walk some getting passed by more people who I think "I should be beating them!" Again I choose to change my thought pattern and smile.
Then it hits, nearing the 5k left point I hear a familiar voice in the distance, it's Rob with his athlete catching up to me. My heart sinks, well at least my competitive heart does. I push to stay ahead, then it hits me run grateful. Grateful for every step forward! Grateful for the beauty that surrounds me! Grateful for every person I am running with on this day! Rob passes me and doesn't realize it, I slow again to a walk, hoping this race will finish yet somehow still grateful. As I finish the last of the race, I continue to keep this positive attitude of running grateful, I come into the finishline smiling (I hope) and sprinting, knowing that I finished well. I ran grateful! With a better time than the year before but not better then my PR on that race I finished with the best attitude I've ever had. I felt alive inside! I was ready to congratulate my "opponents" on a job well done.
So now as I look back on this race and what I've learned, well it's that really and truely attitude makes the difference. You can't necessarily change the physical circumstances of something but you sure can change your attitude. I hope that in the future I can continue to run grateful!
I had run this race before and had known how humbling it was so being knocked down a few notches running this quite challenging race wasn't a surprise. What was learned from this race is the question I plan to answer. I chose to run this race with my dad, it's something we do now, torture ourselves in distance road races...don't ask why, weird therapy I guess. Anyway so my original goal in the race was to keep up with my dad, then to keep up or beat my friend (Rob) who ran the race with an athlete in tandem (pushing a athlete who is unable to run in a wheelchair of sorts). As per my usual I didn't train well for this race, no hill or speed training, just a few longer runs here and there. The course has a hill on it known as "Monster Hill" or "Golgotha" for it's grueling incline. That being said, for one to do well they should train. So I put myself in a great place to learn a little humility, especially because I have quite the mouth and will trash talk a little bit.
I started the race out keeping up with my dad, for approximately 2 minutes, he then took off and my thought was well I can maybe keep up. I quickly realized that was a pipe dream and chose to focus on my own pace and enjoy the race. I finished the first and second hill and was passed by one of Rob's teammates with an athlete in tandem, I was taken aback grateful however that it wasn't Rob (my competitive spirit came out). This is when my brain started processing some ideas. I was then passed by another athlete team, at this point one word kept running through my head, GRATEFUL. What it meant I wasn't far from understanding.
Around mile 5 and about to climb hill number 3, I began to feel my lack of training, my feet began throbbing. My immediate thought was to pity myself, well you were just so busy helping others achieve there goals you couldn't train and work is really stressful. Then I thought about those who were passing me. My dad with a fulltime job and a family to take care of. Rob, who works fulltime and then was helping a fellow athlete. So I squashed the pity thoughts and continued to run to the best of my ability. Not long after this point I was passed by a runner without arms, I don't know his story but I do know that I use my arms a good amount while running, especially when I haven't trained. So here I am a few minutes before trying to pity myself for not training and I'm passed by an athlete who isn't whole according to traditional standards. More pain kicks in while running down the last hill followed by another runner sans arms. My thought is "really? really?", now realizing that maybe this race was to teach me something.
I'm now running and thinking more. Remembering the need to be grateful for all the little things. So I start small. Well I'm breathing, I think, it's labored breath and not consistent from lack of training but I'm still alive and breathing. Then it's the fact that I do have a body that works and carries me through the miles that I push it through. Followed by thankfulness for the cool breeze keeping me from overheating on this hot day. Now my mind is filled with thoughts of gratefulness for this event. I continue to run, counting the miles hoping to finish soon. I hit the trail, which I consider the hardest part of this race, it's a mind game, over half way there and supposedly downhill, it never seems that easy from that point. I'm dragging beginning to walk some getting passed by more people who I think "I should be beating them!" Again I choose to change my thought pattern and smile.
Then it hits, nearing the 5k left point I hear a familiar voice in the distance, it's Rob with his athlete catching up to me. My heart sinks, well at least my competitive heart does. I push to stay ahead, then it hits me run grateful. Grateful for every step forward! Grateful for the beauty that surrounds me! Grateful for every person I am running with on this day! Rob passes me and doesn't realize it, I slow again to a walk, hoping this race will finish yet somehow still grateful. As I finish the last of the race, I continue to keep this positive attitude of running grateful, I come into the finishline smiling (I hope) and sprinting, knowing that I finished well. I ran grateful! With a better time than the year before but not better then my PR on that race I finished with the best attitude I've ever had. I felt alive inside! I was ready to congratulate my "opponents" on a job well done.
So now as I look back on this race and what I've learned, well it's that really and truely attitude makes the difference. You can't necessarily change the physical circumstances of something but you sure can change your attitude. I hope that in the future I can continue to run grateful!
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Chasing
So this one needs a disclaimer:
To those guy friends no matter how hard for us women to see you as only friends we(well I) value your relationships one hundred percent!
As a little kid, and even now, I used to chase the guys around. You could find me at any point chasing, teasing and terrorizing the guys in my life. Now in my life it is more the teasing.
I tend to be one of those girls with lots of guy friends, my buddies, where would I be without them. Well that is where this thought came from. Where would I be without the attention of men in my life. I love the attention enough that I am willing to lie to myself that I'm not bummed when someone isn't interested in me romantically cause, I would rather have some attention than none at all. This problem with going into friendships with the intention of just being friends, even though I play it off (or think I do) as just whatever, is it is really tough. I admit it I have a heart that desires to be loved by someone. The funniest part is when I say stuff like that I realize, "I am loved!" What is it that causes me to devalue the friendships that I have, to pursue romance, to CHASE after the next "10" on my list?
It would be so easy to put this off on culture..."romantic porn" you know those cheesy "rom coms" we watch and torture ourselves through. Or it could be that "oh so many of my friends are dating/getting married." Then there's the "well I'm bored so dating would spice up my life." (Writing these down is fairly humbling, I feel kind of silly knowing that I've entertained all of these excuses). So to get to my point why do I chase after romantic relationships?
It's this thing called a hole! I have one and I think most of us do. It's this hole that we try to fill to make us whole. Depending on the season I attempt to fill it with different things, but the most consistent for me is guys, just male attention in general. Well lately, over my life actually, I have realized each time I try to figure this out, that there really is only one thing that fills that hole that makes me feel complete. That hole is filled with my relationship with Jesus. He is the one never changing never leaving part of my life. When I look over my life and see patches of complete contentment the only constant is Him. This is not to say that I desire to spend my life single and without a companion. But what I do desire is that no matter who my companion be or where I'm at in life that I would not allow anyone but Jesus to have that place that fills that hole. I want to be a complete person with and with out a significant other in my life. I want to be able to live life to the fullest no matter what my relationship status may be. I want to quit chasing romance and start living a life that is full, and when romance comes my way I want it to be the cherry on top of a wonderful, fulfilling life.
So I guess to end this what is that thing that you chase? How does it get in the way of pursuing a relationship with Jesus of spending time being content with wherever life has you? For me it's not spending time allowing myself to know how much God loves me, and how much He shows me that through the people around me. I think it's awesome to just sit back and look at life from the outside and see it's beauty and not be caught in the immediate. But at the same time to be fully present in the moments around us!
To those guy friends no matter how hard for us women to see you as only friends we(well I) value your relationships one hundred percent!
As a little kid, and even now, I used to chase the guys around. You could find me at any point chasing, teasing and terrorizing the guys in my life. Now in my life it is more the teasing.
I tend to be one of those girls with lots of guy friends, my buddies, where would I be without them. Well that is where this thought came from. Where would I be without the attention of men in my life. I love the attention enough that I am willing to lie to myself that I'm not bummed when someone isn't interested in me romantically cause, I would rather have some attention than none at all. This problem with going into friendships with the intention of just being friends, even though I play it off (or think I do) as just whatever, is it is really tough. I admit it I have a heart that desires to be loved by someone. The funniest part is when I say stuff like that I realize, "I am loved!" What is it that causes me to devalue the friendships that I have, to pursue romance, to CHASE after the next "10" on my list?
It would be so easy to put this off on culture..."romantic porn" you know those cheesy "rom coms" we watch and torture ourselves through. Or it could be that "oh so many of my friends are dating/getting married." Then there's the "well I'm bored so dating would spice up my life." (Writing these down is fairly humbling, I feel kind of silly knowing that I've entertained all of these excuses). So to get to my point why do I chase after romantic relationships?
It's this thing called a hole! I have one and I think most of us do. It's this hole that we try to fill to make us whole. Depending on the season I attempt to fill it with different things, but the most consistent for me is guys, just male attention in general. Well lately, over my life actually, I have realized each time I try to figure this out, that there really is only one thing that fills that hole that makes me feel complete. That hole is filled with my relationship with Jesus. He is the one never changing never leaving part of my life. When I look over my life and see patches of complete contentment the only constant is Him. This is not to say that I desire to spend my life single and without a companion. But what I do desire is that no matter who my companion be or where I'm at in life that I would not allow anyone but Jesus to have that place that fills that hole. I want to be a complete person with and with out a significant other in my life. I want to be able to live life to the fullest no matter what my relationship status may be. I want to quit chasing romance and start living a life that is full, and when romance comes my way I want it to be the cherry on top of a wonderful, fulfilling life.
So I guess to end this what is that thing that you chase? How does it get in the way of pursuing a relationship with Jesus of spending time being content with wherever life has you? For me it's not spending time allowing myself to know how much God loves me, and how much He shows me that through the people around me. I think it's awesome to just sit back and look at life from the outside and see it's beauty and not be caught in the immediate. But at the same time to be fully present in the moments around us!
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